


Another New Start

by ChibiDargon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Torture, Protective Castiel, Supportive Sam Winchester, Tattooed Castiel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-25 17:50:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16665430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChibiDargon/pseuds/ChibiDargon
Summary: Castiel left his messed up, manipulative family behind and never looked back, he moved to California and dealt with a year of high school there, then, after an incident resulting in the death of a classmate, Castiel left there, too.Now he's moved to Lawrence, Kansas, home to one Dean Winchester.Dean has been running himself ragged the last couple of years, trying to keep a roof over his and Sammy's heads. John, is, of course, nowhere to be found, and it's up to him to keep his little brother healthy and happy. Then a mysterious new guy moves to town and messes up the tenuous equilibrium he's created for himself.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So, this is the first work I've written for this fandom, I have a couple of chapters written, and, barring complications, I should be posting regularly? Maybe? Life is crazy so please don't hold it against me in the meantime.

_Castiel opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was blood, everywhere, covering everything. There were people screaming and all he saw was the sickly red thick liquid he was laying in._

_He felt his eyes drooping, felt death before he could tell what it was, and it was cold. He closed his eyes, the brilliant blue extinguished, never to be seen again._

He blinked. Awake again, not remembering what about his nightmare had roused him before he checked his clock. School today.

\---

Reluctantly, Castiel slid out of bed into the silence of his empty house. He walked slowly to the bathroom attached to his bedroom and turned on the light. He tried to ignore his ever-messy hair, and took off his clothes, stepping into the shower and trying to mentally prepare himself for what laid ahead that day.

When he finally got out of the shower, it was only because the water began to cool off. He wrapped a towel around his waist, and brushed his teeth. When finally he emerged from the bathroom, it was 7:28 AM, exactly 1 hour and 10 minutes until the first bell would ring for school.

Opting to wear a t-shirt, Castiel threw on what he knew was probably too many layers for the sunny weather. Dark jeans, white t-shirt, blue and red flannel, and tan trench coat.

After eating a rushed breakfast, Castiel made the decision to walk to school his first day, he had nothing better to do, and it’s only 20 minutes away by foot. He grabbed $20 for lunch, stuffed it into his bag, and walked out the door of his too big house. 30 minutes left. 

\---

“Sammy if you don’t hurry up we’re both going to be late for school” Dean called the warning to his little brother who was still in the shower. Not even 10 seconds later, the younger Winchester was running into the bedroom of the latest motel they were staying at, fully clothed, hair still sopping wet, grabbing his bag.

“Dean didn’t you make food?” it wasn’t a question, not really, Dean had made some pancakes, though there was no evidence of it.

“Um, no. No I did not, here” Dean handed Sam a $10 bill “get yourself something at school ok?” he had a distinctly guilty look on his face, Sam rolled his eyes and nodded.

“Alright Dean, thanks” he smiled.

And with that the Winchester brothers were in leaving the motel, and piling into the Impala.

\---

Castiel knew that he had to meet with the principle at some point today, and he had time now so he walked down to the main office of the building and asked to see Mr. MacLeod. He only had to wait a moment before the secretary said “Alright Mr. Novak, follow me please”.

Castiel followed the secretary to the last door in the main office, which read F. MacLeod, he knocked on the door, and a voice answered “Come in.”

After pushing open the door, Castiel stepped into the room which was nothing at all like what he had expected. He didn’t know exactly _what_ he was expecting, but whatever it was, it wasn’t this. The walls were painted a deep mahogany, the floor was Onyx tiles, there was a fireplace, and the man who sat lazily behind the desk was the sort of person you might expect to be able to make shady deals for illicit substances with. The wooden desk and high-backed leather chairs only served to make the room look creepier.

Mr. MacLeod broke the silence by saying irritably in a vaguely Scottish sounding accent “I said come in, and close the door too, we haven’t got all day.”

And so Castiel entered the office, closing the door behind himself.

“Mr. MacLeod, I was asked to come and speak with you at some point today?”, the principle cringed a bit when Castiel said his name. “Call me Crowley, or Mr. Crowley if it makes you more comfortable, just, nobody in this school calls me by my real name.” Crowley sighed and continued “So, Mr. Novak, have a seat.” he gestures to the chair across from himself.

“About why you’re here to see me this morning Castiel, I was reading through your records and saw something rather disturbing” Castiel just looked at him, stone faced, “ it said that the reason you are coming here, the reason that you moved, was because of some sort of violent altercation that had occurred at school. Would you mind telling me about that?” Castiel looked at him and asked a question that the principle clearly did not see coming. “Mr. Crowley, to my knowledge I have no obligation to answer that question, so would you mind telling me whether you are asking me this for the school, or to satisfy your own morbid curiosity?”

Crowley stared at him for a moment, bewildered, before letting out an amused laugh and saying “To be frank, I’m just curious, though it is my obligation to ask if you pose a threat to the student body.” Castiel nodded slowly.

“In that case, all you need to know is that a group of students attacked me, I very nearly lost my life, and one student was not as lucky as I was. Everything I did that day was in the name of self defense, and legally it was no fault of mine. Do you need me for anything else Mr. Crowley?” Crowley just shook his head and said “Don’t work too hard then Novak!” cheerfully as Castiel stood and left without another word.

He asked for his schedule from the guidance office and went on his journey to find his first class, AP World History. It was going to be a long day.

\---

Dean Winchester got to school fashionably right-on-time, and headed to the guidance office for his schedule just in time to see a boy he’d never seen before wearing a tan trench coat walking down the hall away from him.

Once his schedule was in his hands, he frowned. He had a study hall 1st period so he made his way to the cafeteria just in time to see his friends walking to class when Jo stopped him “Hey Winchester, what’ve you got first?” she smiled brightly at him, he rolled his eyes “Study hall, Harvelle, you?” she smiled even more brightly if that was possible. “Same, let’s go sit down” 

Dean and Jo walked together to their usual table in the cafeteria and began recounting to each other their tales of summer vacation. Dean carefully avoided any and all topics that could lead to his father or his living situation. 

1st period ended far too soon, and until lunch, Dean made a point to not pay attention to anything going on around him. Lunch however, lunch was different.

Dean found himself to be a part of two distinct social circles. His friends, and the Football team. 

He hung out with the football team at lunch that day, because he needed money.

“Hey, Gordon, wanna help me with something?” Dean was standing beside the table where Gordon Walker, Cole Trenton, Zachariah Adler, Alastair Atwood and Benny Lafitte sat. 

“Sure Winchester, how can we be of service?” Dean bit his lip, Benny and Cole were ok guys, but the rest of them? He didn’t like doing this but he really well and truly needed the cash. He gestured to a junior who’s mom always sends him to school with $100, poor kid didn’t even know what was happening until he was being cornered in the hallway 2 minutes later.

“What do you want?” The kid asked not seeming to realize how fucked he already was at this point. 

“What’s your name kid?” Dean asked, mocking in his voice.

“K-kevin Tran, I’m in advanced placement, please… Don’t hurt me!” Dean chuckled, and said “Tell you what Kevin, you give me your cash, and I won’t do a thing to you.” he was pinning the kid against the wall, talking right into his ear so Gordon, Zach, and Benny couldn’t hear.

Kevin nodded quickly, and handed him 5 crumpled $20 bills. Dean smiled and let him go, “Thanks kid” he said cheerfully, then to his friends he said, “take it easy on him, kid just made my day.” Then he walked away as the others beat up Kevin Tran, and didn’t look back. 

Sam came first, no matter what. And Dean would do what he needed to do to keep his little brother fed.

\---

Castiel was walking down the hall during Senior lunch when he caught sight of something that he really didn’t need to see on his first day at a new school. A kid laying motionless on the hallway floor, covered in his own blood, with people walking past as if it were nothing. Not noticing, not caring. Not stopping.

All at once Castiel found himself making sure that the kid was alive. Checking if he was conscious. He was, and Castiel breathed a sigh of relief. “Can you walk?” he asked. The kid nodded, and stood, limping slowly, using Castiel’s body as support.

“Where is the nurse's office?” Castiel asked, hoping he wouldn’t need to take the kid to the hospital.

“Room 106, but the nurse doesn’t start for another week.” 

Damn it

“What’s your name?” Castiel asked, hoping to distract the kid from his injuries

“Kevin Tran” 

“Kevin, do you think you need to go to the hospital?” Kevin shook his head once

“No, but I don’t want to stay here…” The pleading look on his face as he turned to face Castiel was enough to convince him to let Kevin go to his house, but…

“Kevin, I left my car at my house, have you got one?” After a moment’s thought he replied “I don’t but I have a friend in grade 12 who does, I’ll ask her.”

Kevin got out his phone, and called his friend.

“Hey Charlie, do you think that you could meet me by the math hall? … Now, if possible … Alright, thanks Charlie, you’re a lifesaver …”

“She is on the way. By the way, what’s your name, I don’t think I’ve seen you around before?”

“Castiel,” he said, looking at his feet, “I’ve just moved to Lawrence, so this is my first day at this school.” He looked up, Kevin nodded. Smiled and said “It’s nice to meet you Castiel.” 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you too Kevi-”

He was interrupted by an extremely enthusiastic redhead semi-tackling him with a hug.

“What’s up bitches?” The redhead exclaimed, after extracting herself from Castiel. “Kevin, what happened to you?!”

“I got cornered by a bunch of jocks looking to deprive me of my lunch money, that’s what happened.” He turned his attention back to Castiel “Hey where are we going to go? My mom will freak out if she finds out I skipped out on classes, and she’s home right now.” Charlie looked at Castiel expectantly.

“If Charlie is willing to drive us, I can take care of your injuries at my house. I have an extensive first aid kit.”

“And who might you be?” Charlie asked, still looking at Castiel.

“Castiel, I just move here. I hate to impose but would you mind giving us a ride? I'm concerned that he’s yet to stop bleeding…”

Charlie nodded vigorously “Of course, I could never turn my back on a friend in need!” 

They walked out to her car, all the while Charlie and Kevin talking about TV shows that Castiel hasn’t seen. 

“So, Castiel, what’s the address?” He gave it to her.

\---

Dean was sitting in the same place he’d been sitting since he and the others attacked Kevin Tran. The back of the Cafeteria. He was staring at the stack of $20 bills in front of him. $40 to put away. $40 for the motel room. $20 for food.

He sighed, wishing he had another way, any other way, to get money. He got a job over the summer, but that’s all it was. A summer job. So now he needed to get another job while his money lasted.

Looking around the mostly empty Cafeteria, Dean decided to go make sure Kevin was alright. He walked to where they had cornered him, and saw a bit of blood on the wall. Nothing too incriminating. But Kevin was gone, probably in class being the overachiever that he is. Dean thought to himself, at least he got back up.

\---

Charlie had needed to leave right away, because senior lunch was almost over.

Castiel helped Kevin over to the sitting room and had him sit down on the couch. Once he had done so, Castiel went about ensuring that he didn’t have a concussion. He gripped Kevin’s chin lightly, and tilted and turned his head.

The worst of the damage was to his nose and cheekbones, though he had bruises pretty much everywhere. There were a few cuts on his back that Castiel disinfected and dressed, in the case of a particularly bad one on Kevin’s upper left arm, he even had to throw a few stitches, numbing the area first, of course.

When he was satisfied that Kevin’s injuries were treated, he put away the first aid kit and returned to the sitting room. Taking a seat on the couch opposite Kevin, who had been giving him weird looks for the last 20 minutes.

Castiel finally broke the silence. “What is it?”

“Castiel, why do you know how to do stitches so well…”

“Oh,” Castiel looked at Kevin in the eyes “that’s all?” Kevin nodded.

“In my family, let us just say that it paid to be able to treat injuries.”

He gave no further information, and the way he said it told Kevin not to press the issue. 

The two talked for a few minutes about nothing in particular, until Kevin asked the other question that had been on his mind since he got there, “Where are your parents?”

Castiel immediately looked uncomfortable, any semblance of relaxation he had adopted since sitting down with Kevin was gone. “I don’t know, and I don’t care. This house belongs to me. For all I know they’re dead.” Kevin desperately wanted to ask for more information, that much was obvious to Castiel. But the look on his face must have set of warnings for Kevin because he let the subject drop.

2 Hours Later - 

Castiel drove Kevin to his place at around 4:40 in the afternoon. On the way, Castiel asked him who had attacked him at the school.

“I told you and Charlie before, just a bunch of Jocks.” Castiel glanced over, clearly wanting more information.

“Kevin. Please tell me who did this to you, if not to get them in trouble, then to let me know who to avoid. I’m new in town, and I’m not in any particular hurry to get singled out by bullies in my first week.” Kevin gave in then, he looked down at his feet and began to study them intently. After a moment or two of collecting himself, Kevin spoke. 

“It was Dean Winchester, Zachariah Adler, Gordon Walker and Benny Lafitte. Dean was after my cash, the rest of them just seemed to want to beat somebody up.” Silence filled the car, and it was deafening. 

It seemed to be forever before the car pulled up at the Tran house, and Kevin made to get out.

“Kevin, you have senior lunch off, right?” Kevin nodded “In that case, if you get hassled by those guys again any time soon, send them in my direction. I’ll be in the cafeteria, probably alone.” Leaving no room for complaints, with that Castiel began to depart from the driveway.

\---

Dean picked up Sam from school without incident, drove him back to the motel. Then he walked to the nearby grocery store to pick up some food.

Macaroni and Cheese was on sale, so he got a pack of that. As well as toaster waffles, and some coffee. He had a bit extra in his budget for the night, so he got some bacon to make for breakfast the next couple of days.

On his way home, Dean spotted a familiar tan trench coat getting out of a car in front of a house that was just sold last week. Huh…

He kept walking until he got to the motel. 

“Sammy, how does Mac n’ Cheese sound for dinner?”

“Sounds good Dean. How was your day?” By the way he said it, Dean got the feeling Sam was trying to get Dean to talk about his feelings. Which, nope. 

“Peachy, as usual, what about you Sammy, what’d you do at school?” Sam looked disappointed, but only for a minute. “Actually, there’s this girl, I’d seen her around school before, but we’re actually in the same class this time so…” He stopped on account of his brother’s grin.

“What!?” Sam said, sounding defensive, when realistically there was nothing to be defensive about. It was just Dean being Dean.

“Nothing Sammy, can’t I just be happy that my little brother is finally dating?” He said. No sarcasm, it was genuine. 

Sam started blushing furiously red, and said “We’re not dating, I only talked to her for a few minutes but… Dean, I really like her.” 

“I’m happy for you Sammy.”

“It’s Sam…” Sam grumbled as Dean boiled water in the small kitchenette in the motel room. 

The brothers spent dinner in comfortable silence, before Sam went off to bed, and Dean started texting Jo.

**Jo:** Dean, please tell me you didn’t beat up Kevin Tran today with those assholes from the Football team?!

Dean had to read through the text several times to absorb what it said. He ran a hand across his face and he felt all of the guilt that he had been pushing down since lunch come bubbling up.

**Dean:** I swear to you Joanna Beth Harvelle, that I did not beat up Kevin Tran.

It was true. He didn’t beat the kid up, he just took his money and left him in the lion’s den with 3 hungry lions.

**Jo:** Well what did you do, because Meg Masters has been telling everybody that you did

Meg Masters, well shit, that girl practically ran the rumor mill. If she wanted the school to believe that he had beaten up Kevin Tran, then even if he wasn’t in the same country as the guy, the school would believe it.

Tomorrow was going to suck. And he still needed more money. Well, if the school already believed he was picking on Kevin Tran, may as well go with it. Right? He’d just go after Kevin again, by himself this time. And try not to need to do any more damage. He needed the money. But there was no need for Jo to know that. 

**Dean:** What the hell? Jo I swear, I barely laid a hand on that kid, whatever the others did to him after I left, that’s on them. Not on me.

**Dean:** Do you know if Kevin made it to his other classes though? I didn’t see him around school the rest of the day.

**Jo:** Meg said he left with Charlie Bradbury and some new kid wearing a trench coat or something. But it’s Meg, so she’s probably lying.

Trench coat… He wondered if it was the same guy he’d been seeing around all day. Probably, who the hell wears a trench coat in this weather? 

**Dean:** True, look, I’ll see you tomorrow, ok Jo?

**Jo:** Ok, goodnight. See you tomorrow Winchester.

\---

Castiel went to bed as soon as he got home. Only stopping to change into pajamas. He fell into bed, wondering to himself about the guys who attacked Kevin, and whether patching up wounds would, yet again, become a regular fixture in his life.

He drifted off to sleep quickly. Hoping absently for a dreamless sleep, considering the alternative.

_He opened his eyes again to blood. To screaming. To screaming, and shouting. The still warm liquid that covered his body sinking deeper into his skin by the moment._

_He felt the pain on his arm and wished to god that he was the lucky bastard who had already bled out on this floor. His thoughts were yet again interrupted by the feeling of pain in his arm. His leg. His back._

_He saw now that the blood around him was mixing with his own. Relief washed over him as his eyes closed of their own volition. Reminding him that death would pull him out of his living nightmare.  
_

Castiel woke with a start. For once he remembered the nightmare. His arm felt like the burns and cuts in it had only been inflicted a moment ago. Not nearly a year ago. 

Checking his clock, Castiel saw that it was 6:45 in the morning. He needed to get out of bed to get ready for school. Walking to the bathroom, he realized that the house was inordinately cold, the tiled floor of the bathroom felt like ice to his bare feet. Looking in the mirror, he also saw bags under his eyes from his restless sleep, and his eyes were, themselves, bloodshot. 

Castiel stripped off his pajamas, and entered the walk-in shower. 5 minutes later he was brushing his teeth, and trying in vain to tame his hair. Eventually he gave up, leaving the bathroom.

7:00 AM found Castiel looking for reasonable clothes. He decided on an old AC/DC t-shirt, that was probably his older brother’s at some point, a blue and white flannel, and his trench coat. 

Soon he was eating an omelette and watching a strange TV show Charlie and Kevin had demanded that he watch, called Dr. Who. 

At exactly 8:00 a very confused Castiel was stepping out the door of his house and walking toward his car. He drove to the school and walked to the office for the second day in a row. This time to explain why he had left early the previous day.

\---

Sam and Dean were out the door earlier that the day before, Dean drove Sam to school early, and then headed to the High School.

When he pulled up in the parking lot, the guy with the trench coat was walking into the school. Without really thinking about it first, Dean hurried into the school and followed him. With no regard for where the kid was going. Which, as it turned out, was the main office.

Fuck

Dean figured that the trench coat guy was about to report him for assaulting Kevin Tran, or stealing his money at least. If he was to believe Meg Masters, he went home with Kevin and Charlie during lunch, he probably knew everything that had happened the previous day.

He sat at a bench just inside the main office and tried to listen to the conversation he was having with the secretary. He heard the majority of the conversation.

“Hello there. My name is Castiel Novak, I left early yesterday. I was… Hoping to clear up the reason for my absence?” Dean had to do a double take that it really was trench coat guy talking. That voice did not sound like it belonged to a teenager.

“Of course Mr. Novak, was there something that came up that you couldn’t sign out for?” the response was full of veiled annoyance.

“Yes. Actually yesterday I found a student in the hallway covered in fresh injuries. He informed me that the school nurse would not be there until some time after the first week of school. Also his mother was not home, and he refused my offer to take him to the hospital. I am well versed in practical medicine and so Kevin and I asked Charlie Bradbury to take us to my house so that I could treat his injuries properly.” he sighed audibly “After that, although he had no outward signs of concussion, I thought it best to observe him, to ensure his safety.”

The secretary gawked at him. “Which student is this?’

“Kevin Tran, I believe he is in Junior Year.” The secretary nodded.

“Thank you, Mr. Novak. I will ensure that your teachers are aware that your absence was excused. Please just sign this?”

_Why was this kid able to excuse his own freaking absences. Whatever._

\---

The beginning of the day was boring. Castiel went to his classes. Took thorough notes. And then moved on to the next class. In general the only class that was giving him any trouble at all was nothing to do with the class, everything to do with the teacher. He hated his Economics teacher, Mr. Roman.

Finally it was lunch. Making his way to the table he told Kevin he would be at. He sat down, glancing at his wallet. He could buy food, but he figured he really wasn’t hungry so he grabbed a couple of $20s just in case Kevin had his money stolen again, and then put the wallet away safely in his pencil case. It was a habit he had picked up from his brother a few years ago and never quite let go of.

Castiel then proceeded to take out his Math homework, the more he did now the less he would have to do later, right? 

He only looked up when he heard an obvious struggle going on on the other side of the cafeteria. Kevin. He was surrounded by 3 really strong looking guys. He pointed towards Castiel, and the 3 guys were joined by a 4th. Leaving Kevin safely on the other side of the Cafeteria, probably minus $100. 

_\---_

Dean felt bad targeting the poor kid again, especially since he was already pretty injured, but he had $100. So he pushed Kevin against the wall in the Cafeteria. He leaned in close to the kid’s ear and said: “You know what I want Kevin?” Kevin just nodded and handed him a small banker’s envelope with money in it.

“Thanks, kid,” Dean said, the words toxic as they left his mouth. The others began to descend on Kevin again before the kid said, really quietly, “You guys don’t want to do this” and the 3 halted.

“Oh yeah, and why’s that Kev?” Zach asked, taking in the damage he and the others had dealt yesterday.

“My friend will fuck you up, that’s why. He said to send you in his direction if you guys messed with me again.” Kevin looked very confident, which was not a normal look for him, which might have been why Benny asked him “Oh yeah, and who might your friend be?”

“The kid in the trench coat, Castiel,” Kevin said, pointing at Castiel, across the Cafeteria.

_\---_

In that exact moment, Castiel made a decision. He stood up confidently and walked towards the guys who were just surrounding Kevin. He then gestured at them to take this out of the Cafeteria, and walked out of the building into the parking lot. 

The 4 students approaching him all looked relatively strong, physically at least. One, with short brown hair, was obviously the sort of person who never had to work for anything. He was the least muscled of the group stalking towards him, and everything he was wearing probably cost at least $200. Right down to his $2000 watch. Typical fucking rich kid.

The dark skinned guy, walking beside the proverbial leader of the pack was going to attack with muscle, not with his brain.

The other two were more interesting profiles. The one with short hair and blue eyes was hanging back. Presumably the backup.

Meanwhile, the leader looked equal parts curious and desperate. After a long moment, Castiel turned to face him fully. When he noticed something that he should have already noticed. This boy is gorgeous. His eyes shone a beautiful green that couldn’t quite decide whether it was warm or cool toned. He was frozen in place, when he finally realized that he was openly staring, it was clear that he was not the only one. The green-eyed boy hadn’t looked away either.

_\---_

Running out of the school building with Gordon, Zach, and Benny after the trench coat kid (Castiel?) was not something Dean thought he would be doing today. Although this was proof that the unexpected can and does happen. 

Dean looked at the kid wearing the trench coat as he slowly surveyed the group that had followed him out the door. Until he turned fully and looked right at Dean. 

The first thing that Dean noticed looking at the kid head on, was his eyes. They were blue. Almost painfully so, they looked like sapphires or cracked ice or water on a clear day. Maybe even all of those things.

He stared directly into Castiel’s eyes until he realized that he had been staring into Castiel’s eyes for probably longer than was socially acceptable.

When he finally looked away, that was when all hell broke loose. Castiel spoke first.

“Might I ask the four of you what you wanted with Kevin Tran?” Gordon and Zach laughed, but Benny stayed silent. He was probably bored. Dean didn’t say anything because the dangerous voice that Castiel had used made him immediately regret his decision to come out here, no, to mess with Kevin in the first place.

“No answer? Well, might I strongly suggest that you cease your harassment of him.” Castiel’s voice was eerily calm. His blue eyes seemed to sear into Dean’s mind.

“Hell no, we like messing with your little friend, and you know what, maybe we’ll add you to the list, huh, Castiel?” Zach taunted.

Castiel sighed, and something like annoyance flashed quickly through his eyes. “I’ll tell you what, Zachariah Adler. You stop fucking with Kevin Tran, I’ll let you try your hand against me, but I’ll warn you that you’d need an army to win.”

Something about his voice rang true to Dean. So Dean decided to (at least personally) stop messing with Kevin. Better to solve this dispute diplomatically.

He reached out his hand to Castiel’s shoulder slowly, only just then realizing that Castiel was a couple of inches shorter than himself, he looked imposing enough that height seemed not to matter, the second his hand made contact with Castiel’s arm, he realized his mistake. Castiel twitched violently, and his other arm launched forward, he hit Dean in the gut with an open palm. Hard.

Dean was so shocked by the blow he didn’t even react. Just staggered backwards, and fell to the ground. He watched Castiel’s face go from emotionless to horrified in less than a second.

\---

He didn’t mean to do that. God, of all the things he could have done. He freaking knocked their leader airborne.

_Fuck_

Dean just laid on the ground about a foot away, looking confused and in pain, oh god he just hurt this kid who has never hurt him, who was probably just about to talk to him and he freaked out because of the touch to his arm.

_Fuck_

Castiel didn’t have nearly enough time to have a minor mental breakdown, because not 5 seconds later, the world caught up to him. He was pinned to the ground by Gordon and Zach, if he needed to, he could escape. It wasn’t the strongest hold he’d ever been under. Then Benny stood over him. And whistled.

Gordon and Zach were holding an arm and a leg each while Benny kicked his side and stomach repeatedly.

His arms.

Fuck, they had his arms.

And all thoughts went out the window. Castiel saw red, he pulled himself to his feet with ease, simply overpowering the other students. He grabbed the arms of the two who had been holding him down, and twisted them. Shoving them to the ground easily. He delivered a solid punch to each of their temples, knocking them out without doing other damage.

Then he pulled up the one still on the ground. He was about to break his wrist when he saw those eyes.

Green. It calmed him down, and he was him again.

He dropped Dean’s arm and looked to the ground and said quietly, “my apologies, I lost myself for a moment. I hope you’ll forgive me.”

_\---_

Dean wasn’t exactly sure what the hell just happened, but whatever it was, there was a moral to the story. Don’t fuck with Kevin Tran.

Castiel looked back up at him, the emotionless mask clearly back in place. “Yeah, uh, yeah. I won’t… I’ll leave Kevin alone, promise.” he held out his hand to shake.  
Castiel accepted, and that was the moment that Benny chose to remind Castiel that he was there. “Not that I really care for picking on Kevin, brother, but can you really speak for those two?” Benny gestured to the unconscious football players.

“Shit, Cas, what the hell, are they ok?” Dean panicked, what if they were dead? Did he just shake hands with the guy who killed his friends?!

“Your friends are alive. They will wake with no wounds but to their pride. And a headache. Be sure to let me know if them and their army want a rematch.” And with that he turned and walked away, stopping to look back at Dean and saying, “It was a pleasure to meet you Dean, Benny.” Then he went back into the school.

\---

Castiel re-entered the Cafeteria to find Kevin, Charlie, and a few others who he recognized from classes or the halls, waiting for him.

“So, what happened, are you ok?!” Charlie exclaimed, running over to him for a hug, when he stopped her.

“I am injured, but trust me, you should see the other guys.” Charlie laughed but then Kevin asked “Are you okay though? What did they do to you?”

“I am fine. Benny got in a couple good kicks, but I knocked out Gordon and Zach, so all in all, I’d call this a win.”

The rest of the day went by without incident.

\---

Dean went about his daily routine of isolated conversations with Sammy in the morning, going to school, stealing cash from some unlucky bastard, and then going home. He saw Castiel a few times over the course of the next couple of weeks but didn’t pay him much attention for until he overheard a conversation between Meg Masters and Bela Talbot.

“I heard that he’s crazy rich, but his parents are never home. It must suck, but sometimes I wish that mine would leave me alone you know?” Bela said to Meg, it was a well known fact that Bela Talbot fucking hated her parents.

“You think that Clarence is rich? Please, no w-” Bela interrupted Meg

“Clarence?”

“It’s my name for our dear unicorn Castiel.” Meg said, “Anyways, you think Clarence it rich? if he is he doesn’t act like it, but whatever, why do you think that he is?”

“A friend of mine says that he tips 100% whenever he orders food or anything, every time, and that he pays in 50s and 20s only, also, I heard the mortgage on his house is already paid off.”

“Huh”

Then the girls started walking down the hallway and out of earshot. Suddenly, he had an idea. He’d challenge Castiel to a fight. If he wins, Cas gives him $1000.

What could possibly go wrong?

\---

It was lunch, and Castiel caught sight of bright green eyes moving toward the table where he was sitting with Kevin, Charlie and a couple of their friends.

“Excuse me guys, I’ll be back soon.” Castiel stood and met Dean halfway across the Cafeteria. “Dean, do you need something? What can I help you with?” Dean looked at him, green meeting blue, and he said, “Cas I need to talk to you, can we go outside for a minute?”

Castiel was, understandably, confused. Dean Winchester and he weren’t exactly friends, hell, their one and only interaction had ended with two of Dean’s friends knocked out in the parking lot. But if Dean needed something, Castiel would help any way he could.

“Of course Dean.” Cas said, nodding as he and Dean walked out of the building.

They stood by the parking lot, staring at each other for a long moment. Cas thought that he could see a world behind those eyes that are so wide. All of Dean’s fears, all he cares for, all he desires. Suddenly, Dean’s voice broke his trance.

“Cas I gotta ask you two things and I need you to not freak out or read too much into it, ok?” Cas nodded, “Alright, the first is going to sound weird, and personal and I completely understand if you choose to decline to answer, but it’s important so could you pl-” Cas held up a hand to stop him from talking.

“Dean. Less words.”

“Right. Yeah. Are you rich?” Cas was extremely confused, why did Dean need to know this? It’s not like he had anything to hide so he decided to be honest.

“By the standards of most people. Yes.” Cas said confidently.

“Ok, in that case, does the invitation you extended still stand?” Cas knew immediately he was talking about the invitation to fight he had made a couple of weeks ago. Now his interest was peaked.

“Why, Dean, do you want to fight?” Cas tilted his head a bit to the side in confusion.

“Yeah,” Dean answered uncomfortably. There was clearly more to the story, Cas knew it, so he said “Sure, what are the terms?”

Dean released a breath that he must have been holding for the last few moments. Now Cas was really confused.

‘One on one, Dusk at the parking lot. Winner takes $1000 from the loser.” that Cas had some objections about. 

“Dean, I don’t need the money, how about this. If I win, you have to tell me _why_ you need the money.” Cas extended his right hand. Dean took it and shook.

“Deal.”

“See you tonight then Dean. Also, I get the feeling one of us will need to drive the other home after. So in case you’re unconscious I'd think of something to tell your family. Also, we should probably only have one car.” He was thinking logistics at this point. 

“Cas, how about this, pick me up in your car at the Grocery store near your house at 5:15.”

Cas nodded. “Alright Dean, I’ll meet you there.”

“See you Cas.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas have their fight, and both of them talk about a few things that keep them up at night.

Once classes were over, Dean went to go pick up Sammy from school. The Harvelle’s agreed to look after Sam tonight so Dean could go hang out with a friend of his. 

Sammy wanted to know what was going on, of course. Dean had been acting admittedly shady all day, but that didn’t really mean anything. It was better that Sam not know, anyways. He’d probably try and talk Dean out of it.

Dean dropped Sam off at the Harvelle’s house around 5:00 PM, and drove home. Barely making it to the store on foot by 5:15.

When Dean got to the store, Cas was already there waiting for him.

“Hello, Dean.” He said from his spot leaning against his car. He turned around and walked over to the driver’s side. Dean opened the passenger side door, and got in. As soon as he had his seat belt on, Cas was leaving the Grocery store far behind.

They drove in silence for a few moments, and strangely, it wasn’t the least bit tense. Even though he hardly knew this guy, even though they were about to fight each other. Even though Castiel had a mysterious and probably violent (given how good he was at fighting) past.

“So, Dean, when you decided to challenge me today,” Cas turned briefly to look meet Dean’s eyes, “did you happen to know just how good I am?” Dean laughed a bit, “Yeah, kinda. Benny explained what happened a couple of weeks ago, but there’s actually something been’ nagging me about it.”

“What is it, Dean?”

“I mean, you knocked me away when I went to touch your arm, and you knocked Gordon and Zach out for holding you down, yeah?” Cas nodded, “Then you come back over and grab my wrist before you stopped. Way I see it, Benny’s the only one who actually hurt you, so why’s he the only one you didn’t go after?”

Cas had tensed, his previously open and inviting expression was now guarded and closed off. He looked at Dean again, for a moment, before making his decision. He turned his attention back to the road before simply, “My arm. You all touched it. I… Ask me again later, after the fight, ok?”

That was… Weird. But everyone has their own secrets.

“Ok”

\---

It only took about 5 minutes for Cas to drive to the High School parking lot. Once they got there, Cas realized just how much he really _didn’t_ want to do this. The last time he fought someone seriously… He’d rather not kill Dean Winchester.

Soon the two were standing on the asphalt of the parking lot and staring at each other. Cas wasn’t going to make the first move, this wasn’t his fight, it was Dean’s. 

Dean lunged. He made to punch Cas in the face but it was a fake out, he was really going for the blue eyed boy’s stomach. Cas caught the move and grabbed both of Dean’s fists. Twisting them painfully. When he let go, it was to make a move of his own.

Castiel brought one of his legs around one of Dean’s and pulled. Forcing Dean to the ground. Soon he was on top of Dean in the middle of his new school’s parking lot. And he noticed, not for the first time, how beautiful he was. However, that was hardly appropriate for the situation. 

Dean attempted to land a few hits on him while he was held down, but he couldn’t. Cas brought his fist down into Dean’s solar plexus, knocking the wind out of him, and then Cas repeated the move he had used on Gordon and Zach. Knocking Dean out cold.

Cas carried the other boy to his car easily and placed him in what he hoped was a comfortable position in the backseat.

\---

When Dean began to surface into the world of consciousness, he first became aware of a pounding headache that made him feel sick. _Great, just peachy. A hangover._ Then he felt the growing pain in his gut, under his ribs. He finally woke enough to open his eyes, and found himself in a dark room. Laying down on something far more comfortable than a motel bed.

Wait what the hell

Where was he…

Then the memories came back. The fight. Being knocked out, and that meant that presumably, he was in Castiel’s house right now. Huh, funny how these things work.

“Hello, Dean.” A low voice from the other side of the room said.

“Holy shit! Cas. Were you watching me sleep?! Whatever, so, what’s up? Wait how long have I been out?” Dean was starting to panic.

“Only two hours or so, don’t worry. Anyways,” Cas got up from where he was seated on the other side of the bed, “here, you should take this, it’s for the headache.” he handed Dean 2 pills and a large glass of cold water. Dean took the offered drink and medicine. 

“Well then Cas, I guess this means that you win, huh?”

“I suppose” 

“You wanted to know why I need the money, right?” Cas nodded, Dean sighed, not quite believing that he was about to spill all of his dirty secrets to a virtual stranger, but what the hell, right? You only live once.

“When I was four, my mom died. After that my dad started changing. He started drinking, he lost his job, he started leaving town for months at a time. He’d leave me to take care of Sammy.” Cas looked at Dean, tilting his head slightly, and that was in _no way adorable_ damn it, Winchester, focus. Dean nodded and continued. “My little brother Sam. He was 6 months old when my mom died. Anyways, dad left me to take care of him. Left a bit of cash and just took off. I got a job, I did what I could for Sam, to try and keep a home for us, y’know? But it wasn’t enough. About two years ago, we got evicted from our house. Since then we’ve either been staying with friends or at motels. It’s not looking good when it comes to cash, so last year I…” Dean hesitated. He figured Cas was smart enough to have guessed by now but, he didn’t want to say it out loud.

“You started stealing from the kids at school, right?” Cas asked. To Dean’s surprise, there was no judgment in his voice. Only understanding and sadness. Like he got it. But how could he possibly get it?

Dean looked at Cas and said "I had a job over the summer, but it was just a summer thing. I need $1000 to pay for everything this week, and it's just way too much money. Nobody at school carries that much cash, but even if they did. I'm not that much of an asshole. At least I like to think I'm not." He looked Cas in the eyes and said "That's why. That's the reason I volunteered to get my ass kicked."

Cas looked at him with something like admiration in his eyes and said "You're a much better person than I am." Dean looked at him, confusion, sadness, guilt, anger and other emotions Dean couldn't recognize flashed across his face. For some reason Cas's sadness made Dean feel empty.

"That's not true Cas, you've seen what I've done to help Sam. It's not ok, I just don't see any other options." Then Dean remembered something Cas had said earlier, on the ride to the school. "Hey Cas, when we were going to the school you said to ask about your arm later. After the fight."

Cas just nodded in acknowledgment. "Well, the fight is over Cas. What happened?" Cas turned to look at Dean in the eyes. And began to speak,

\---

_This is a bad idea, don’t tell this guy shit that could get you arrested just because he’s pretty and nice and takes care of his little brother… God Dammit Castiel what is wrong with you, you absolute moron-_

"When I was growing up, the only thing I never worried about was money. My family owned a shadow corporation and ran a rather successful crime business," Dean raised his eyebrows but said nothing. "Eventually, when I turned 6, I was expected to begin training in the additional skills that were vital to the business. When I was 15, I decided that I hated it. I hated being forced to hurt people, and I hated being hurt. It was all too much and I told my eldest brother as much on my 16th birthday." Cas ran a hand over his face. "I asked him to let me leave. We made a deal. I got all of the money that was under my name or in my possession, and in exchange, I change my name, move away, and never go back. As well, I had to allow them to carry out whatever fucked up punishment they deemed to fit the crime." Cas absently rubbed his left arm, and Dean looked torn between confusion and horror. "I'm sure you can guess what they did."

Cas pulled off his trench coat to reveal his bare arms. On the inside of his right forearm, there was a detailed tattoo of a blade of some sort, the outside of his upper arm take up by what looked like feathers (it went higher than the sleeve), and a few lines of a language Dean didn’t recognize, while his left arm was entirely covered in scars. Some pale, but most still burned a bright and furious red. There were marks that were obviously burns, as well as scars that looked like they were from cuts.

_This was a bad idea, he’ll call the cops, they’ll lock you up, and you’ll die in jail. It’s only a matter of how much he tells them, oh god what if he finds out who they are, who Michael is, you’ll never even make it to jail Micha-_

Cas’s thoughts were interrupted by Dean’s voice before he could spiral too deep into his own mind.

\---

Dean stared at the exposed arm for a moment only to turn his gaze back to Cas’s face, and found it was already being returned.

“I’m sorry, honestly. What the hell did they do to that arm Cas?” Castiel looked toward his own mutilated limb before shrugging. “My older brothers, they,” he shuddered and closed his eyes “Luke anyways, he cut the skin down to the nerves and burnt over most of it with a blowtorch. It's not exactly an experience I like to look back on.” 

Not exactly sure what to say to that, Dean just sat quietly until Cas spoke again.

“Dean I have never willingly shown anybody this arm. I would appreciate your silence in regards to this issue.” It wasn't a question. “Of course Cas, though you mind telling me why you would show me?”

Cas chuckled. “You just told me about your family, and I suppose it is also somewhat due to the fact that today is the first anniversary of that incident. I turned 17 today.”

Dean exhaled slowly, “Happy fucking birthday Cas” Cas chuckled again. Quiet and humorless. “Your brothers sound kinda screwed up, no offense.” 

“My whole family is screwed up. I am no exception. I was simply willing to pay the price of leaving.” Cas rested his face in his hands.

“Cas, I hate to ask this, but do you think I could stay here tonight? Sammy is staying with Jo and I don't have my car” for some reason, that made Cas laugh even harder. “Seriously man? I'm not joking.” 

“It's not funny Dean, but I knocked you unconscious so there's just no way in hell I'd be ok with you staying alone at a motel tonight. Consider yourself officially invited to my house for the night. There are three guest rooms so take your pick.” and with that, Castiel got up, and left the room.

Dean found himself laying back on the bed which had greeted him only a few moments before, and couldn’t help but wonder about what other shit had happened to Cas in his life. And his brothers, he wondered if this _Luke_ gave a shit about his little brother, he wondered if he felt bad about cutting through Cas’s arm the way he did. Wondered how somebody could do that to their little brother, and it made him sick.

After an indeterminate amount of time, Dean into a restless sleep.

\---

Upon reaching the kitchen, Castiel remembered that he had started making dinner while Dean was unconscious. He was making pizza (The dough was rising) for dinner, and Apple pie for desert.

Cas realized that Dean might not like these food choices, so he began walking up the stairs to the room Dean was in. 

“Dean?” No response.

“Dean, are you up here?” He opened the door to the room and found Dean sleeping again. Rolling his eyes, Cas shook Dean awake.

“Dean, I'm making dinner.” The reaction that Dean had to those words was instantaneous. He immediately went from horizontal to vertical. “Food?”

Cas stood stunned for a moment, then started laughing so hard tears began to burn the backs of his eyes. “Come on Dean, I need ingredient recommendations.” and with that, they walked down the stairs together.

“I should warn you Cas, I am fairly bad at cooking. Haven't had extensive ingredient choices lately y'know? “ 

“Don't worry. I just require your topping preference for pizza. And, also, do you like pie?” Dean stared at him and the pure excitement on his face at the mention of pie was, frankly, adorable. 

_Adorable? Really Cas, get it together._

Dean excitedly gave his favorite toppings and expressed his love of pie.

“Cas, you're awesome man, seriously. I mean, it's been years since I had homemade pie. You have no idea.”

Cas smiled and said, “I am glad that you like pie, it's my favorite dessert.” Dean hummed in acknowledgment 

“Dean?” Cas suddenly sounded nervous, which was not a tone his voice often took on. “Yeah Cas?” 

“I don't wish to overstep my bounds since I know that you and I barely know each other, but…” Now Dean was confused, was going to ask more about his family? What was going on?

“Spit it out, Cas.”

Cas looked at Dean and dropped his gaze to the counter that separated them. “would you and your brother like to move in here?”

\---

Dean was shell shocked. That was not what he expected the blue eyed man to say. And Cas's voice was so damn genuine that it hurt a bit.

“Why would you offer that, Cas?” 

For a moment Cas just stood in silence, then he said, “As you said earlier, I'm rich Dean, I live alone in a house meant for a family and every time I wake up, it's a reminder of the one I left behind. I've done horrible things in my life, and you have a family that you care about. But not the money to do it.” He looked up at Dean and into his eyes, “If I’ve made you uncomfortable, please just let me know and I will not bring it up again.”

Uncomfortable? That was not the word that Dean would use to describe how he was feeling at that offer. Honestly how the hell could he say no. Cas was a weird guy, with an admittedly shady past and some sort of trench coat obsession, but he was also kind, and generous and he was making a fucking pie. The guy sounded so damned earnest. And he looked like he was 90% sure that Dean was going to shout at him for being insane or something, not name his firstborn after him.

Because to be honest, Dean wasn’t sure that he’d be able to keep him and Sam fed with a roof over their heads for more than a day or two. He was damn near out of money and he hated stealing from the kids at school.

But then there was the whole other dynamic of the fact that Cas and his stupid blue eyes and his stupid sex hair may or may not have been the subject of the most middleschool-girl crush Dean had ever harbored for anybody ever.

It had been a solid 30 seconds since Castiel had said anything and Dean belatedly realized that he had been staring at the guy, jaw literally dropped, probably looking like death warmed over as a result of the fight.

Right, he was supposed to say something.

“... Hell yes…” Dean said quietly after he had regained the ability to speak.

“Really?” Cas asked, looking up into Dean’s eyes.

“Yes, absolutely, if you’re being serious and not fucking with me,” He paused to assess Cas’s expression “you’re not fucking with me, are you?”

Cas, the bastard, actually fucking laughed. After a solid 45 seconds of infectious laughter that had Dean joining in pretty much right away, he finally collected himself enough to say “Dean, I swear, I’m not fucking with you.”

Dean smiled and it was more genuine than it had been in years. But then it was back to reality because the clock read 8:19 and that meant Sam was probably freaking out that he hadn’t called him yet.

Shit. Sam.

“Cas I should probably ask Sam about this, whaddya think?” No sooner were the words out of his mouth that Cas handed him his cell phone, nodded and walked to the counter to begin spreading out the pizza dough.

Dean dialed his little brother’s number and was greeted, on the first ring, with a very relieved sounding Sammy.

“Dean, you’re alright, right?” Dean rolled his eyes.

“Yes dear, I’m perfectly fine. Actually,” Dean allowed himself a moment to revel in the fact that for once, he had good news for his little brother, “I’m great.”

Sam sounded oddly suspicious when he said, slowly, “What’s so great Dean?”

“Sammy, how would you feel about moving out of the motel tomorrow?” There was dead silence over the line, and just when Dean was about to check if Sam had hung up his little brother responded in panic.

“Dean, what happened! Are we out of money? Where will we go what’s happ-” Dean cut him off before he could work himself into a nervous breakdown.

“Sammy. Calm down, I’ve got a friend who invited us to move in.” Dean smiled, had he even stopped smiling in the last few minutes?

“What friend?” Now this part was gonna be awkward but only because Dean had mentioned Cas exactly once and his little brother had officially dubbed him “The Ninja in the Trench Coat”. That one might be harder to explain to both of them.

“Ummm… Don’t freak out, ok?” Dean pleaded.

“Dean, who. Is. it?”

Dean inwardly cringed as he said, louder than he intended “The Ninja in the Trench Coat, Sammy.” Earning one ninja (who had, since leaving the bedroom earlier, evidently put his trench coat back on) quite literally laughing so hard he collapsed, and a suspiciously quiet little brother.

Sammy finally said something. “Dean, are you sure that’s a good idea? You barely know the guy.” 

Although Sam wasn’t wrong, Dean felt like he knew Cas, he knew a lot about something clearly hard for Cas to talk about, and Cas knew about him.

“I trust him Sammy.” Dean didn’t even hesitate before saying it, which is, he’s certain, the reason Sam immediately jumped on board. Dean didn’t trust people. His father had run out, those he’d gotten close to left as soon as they knew his situation. He just couldn’t trust people.

But he trusted Cas.

“In that case… When can we move in?” Sam asked, clearly any reservations he’d had were at the very least, not going to get in the way of this.

“I don’t know…” He paused then looked at the Ninja and asked “when can we move in?”

Cas smiled, got to his feet, wiped his eyes, and resumed adding toppings to pizza. Without looking up he said, “As soon as you want to.”

“Tomorrow” Dean declared, both to Sammy and to Cas.

“Alright, well I’m glad you’re alive Dean, I’ll see you at noon tomorrow, right?” 

“Yea, we’ll grab our stuff from the motel and drive here after, see you tomorrow bitch.”

“Jerk”

He hung up, walking to the other side of the kitchen where Castiel stood, placing various toppings evenly across the pizza in front of him, the first already in the oven.

“How the hell do you cook in a trench coat man?” Dean asked, he was genuinely wondering how the coat was perfectly clean, how Cas managed to do that was a mystery. Witchcraft, probably.

“I prefer long sleeves.” Cas said, not meeting Dean’s eye. Fuck, Dean was officially an even more insensitive fucker than he had already thought. _That_ was why the guy always wore that fashion nightmare of a trench coat. Well if he was already an insensitive asshole, might as well go the distance. He still had something he needed to ask.

“Okay, so I’ve got a question, and if the answer is no I totally and completely get it I just want to ask because I don’t keep much from Sammy and he’s smart and he’ll know something’s up, and he’ll ask about it and I’m just trying to head that o-” 

Cas interrupted him. Looked him dead in the eye and said “Dean. This is the second time in 24 hours. Less words.”

Dean nodded. “Is there a chance in hell you would tell Sammy what you told me? I… I hate lying to the kid…”

_Damn it, damn it damn it damn it. Less than a minute ago, Cas had been smiling, hell, laughing. Now his expression was closed off and his eyes were stony. Damn it._

“If not it’s fine, it’s your life and I don’t want to ask you to do that I don’t know what I was thinking I’m sorry I’ll ju-” 

Castiel raised an eyebrow at him “Dean, you’re rambling. I get it. You don’t want to hide this from your brother, and I understand. He should know who - what - he’s living with. You can tell him, or… We can tell him? I’d prefer it if you didn’t mention anything about my brothers specifically. It… I don’t like thinking about them.”

Dean gazed at Castiel and for a moment all he saw was perfection. This guy, who had been through hell, was pulling Dean out of it too. Along with his brother. Was willing to let Sam know about his past just because Dean asked. Was baking him pie.

“Thank you Cas.”

“It’s no problem Dean. Now,” He popped the pizza into the oven “there is probably something else you should know.”

\---

Castiel was going insane, there was no other way that he would spill his guts about his life to Dean Winchester, invite him to stay with him, and then spill more of his guts. _And yet._

Castiel led Dean to the same couch Kevin had sat on just two weeks before.

Dean looked concerned, it was reasonable, when somebody with Cas’s background says something like that. It rarely means good things.

But this would, somehow, eventually come out. And for some reason, he didn’t want to keep this from Dean. Most of his past would stay hidden, but this… He owed it to Dean to tell him about this. For some reason.

“Dean, I’m sure that you’ve realized that if I left home a year ago, and started school here this year, there’s a time gap. Yes?” Dean nodded and Cas took that as an invitation to continue. “Last year, I lived in California for the majority of the school year. After an incident occurred, I left. It happened in the last month of school, and so I wrote my exams and got the hell out of dodge.

“I was in the hallway on the way to my English class when a group of eight students who had been extremely violent towards me the whole year approached me. Until that point I had done fairly well at not reacting to their torment, as long as they left my arm alone I was, well and truly, fine.

“On this particular day, one of them threw what I can reasonably assume was a pencil case at my arm, and gripped at my wrist after a few minutes of taunts and punches. I hit the guy in the nose. Hard. After that to be honest, I don’t remember much. The one I hit pushed me back against the lockers and gave me a nasty concussion.

“I remember fighting, and hitting one of them in the stomach. Usually, I restrain myself, but I was out of sorts and running on adrenaline. When I came to a few minutes later, the floor was covered in blood. Six of them, I had apparently knocked out, minor injuries, one of them had run away… The last one, the guy I punched in the nose and the gut, he…”

Cas cut himself off and ran his hand over his face, talking about that day made him feel sick. He’s pretty sure that he had still been holding back even then and one of them had ended up dead. 

“What happened Cas?” Dean asked. Castiel could tell by the look on his face that Dean had his suspicions as to what happened to the other boy.

“He died. Internal bleeding, as I understand it he died two days later in the hospital. I nearly joined him, one of them stabbed me in the chest with a pocketknife, but for some reason-” He cut himself off. There was no point to dwelling on the fact that he had lived and gotten off scot-free from killing somebody.

“It was ruled that legally I was not responsible for his death. After a few weeks in the hospital, I finished the year and started looking for a new town.”

Castiel didn’t want to look at Dean, didn’t want to see the look of disgust or hate that was surely on his face at that moment. But he could only avoid the guy for so long, after all, Dean happened to be moving to crouch down in front of him.

“Cas” Castiel heard Dean say his name, but didn’t really register it. He felt hands on his arm, felt knives and flames. He felt the flames on his leg too, all at once he was shaking and he couldn’t catch his breath.

“Cas. Can you hear me? Fuck, Cas, say something!” Dean was talking, Castiel grounded himself with Dean’s voice. After a few minutes that felt like an eternity, Cas was coherent enough to mumble “I killed him Dean, and I left, I ran.”

Dean locked eyes with him and didn’t miss a beat. He said “It wasn’t your fault Cas, It was not your fault.”

And god help him, in that moment, Castiel believed Dean.

\---

Dinner was a quiet affair, there was tension in the air that had an obvious source, but Dean did not want to be the one to bring up what Cas had told him. Clearly the guy didn’t talk about that shit to anybody, and yet he chose to confide in Dean? Why?

Seemingly sensing where Dean’s train of thought had gone Castiel broke a particularly long silence. “I needed you to know who you’re living with. I understand if you don’t want to move here, or if you don’t want your brother here. I won’t be offended, I am hardly a good person-” 

“I’m gonna stop you right there buddy,” Cas stopped talking and abruptly turned away from Dean, fixing his gaze on an interesting spot on the floor. “Like hell you’re not a good person. Cas, you listened to my sob story, baked me pie, and then invited my little brother and me both to live in your house, basically saving our lives.”

Castiel didn’t say anything, but there wasn’t really any response to that. 

“Cas… Thank you, and we will gladly move in tomorrow. If you haven’t reconsidered…”

_Oh go what if he has what if he doesn’t want us here what if this was all a practical joke what if-_

“Of course, Dean” Cas finally abandoned his floor-staring-world-record goals and turned his head to look at Dean. “Now,” he stood up. “How about that pie?”

The rest of the meal was spent talking about music, classic cars, and Cas’s apparent lack of knowledge about TV shows and movies. He hadn’t even seen Star Wars. 

Dean was going to need to fix that.


End file.
